She Used to be a Pearl...

Last time I lived in Midland, I was in a relationship with my high school sweetheart. Now, being back in town, it’s been hard going to places that he and I shared together. It brings back memories, good and bad, that just make me think of the kind of relationship we had. I began to realize how important it is to have a good relationship with your significant other.

Girls, I cannot stress this enough… You don’t need to change who you are to get a guy. I remember all the things I did in high school to get a guy’s attention and I even pretended to like the things he was interested in. For example, my taste in music changed almost every time I got a new boyfriend and I would do this just so he would notice me. I usually got the guy and had an ok relationship, but eventually I just got so tired of pretending to be someone I wasn’t.

Anyway, the biggest problem that I had in my relationship was I fell so hard that I let them treat me poorly. I was afraid of being alone, and honestly I still kind of am. I was so afraid of him leaving me that I was swayed so easily to do things that pleased him. After two and a half years I completely lost sight of who I was, I let him convince me that there probably was no God, and I wasn’t truly happy. He would yell at me even if I brought up my faith and wasn’t very supportive. We fought all the time, used hurtful words, and I was so damaged from our arguments. I held on so long that I was nearly convinced that he was the one. I couldn’t see anything beyond what he told me to see. After all, I had made him the center of my world. At such a young age it is really hard to not only focus on your boyfriend It's hard to think ahead to being out of your parents house, on your own, and onto new and better opportunities.

There were times that I tried to leave but he would always convince me to give him another chance. I know it’s easy to give into promises, but they are usually empty promises. The truth is, people can change but it’s rare that they change in the same relationship that was screwed up. Sometimes it’s best to move on and just hope they learned and can treat someone else better.

Thanks to good friends, I let go. I chose to start fresh. I have never been happier. But the biggest advice I can give to other girls is love someone who builds you up. Not someone who tears you down. The song featured below really helped me when I decided that he was breaking me down. It gave me the strength to get out of a bad situation. If you’re in a damaging relationship, there IS a way out and I promise that in the end you’ll be stronger than you ever were before.

“You don’t have to be a shell.

You’re the one that rules your world.
You are strong and you’ll learn that you can still go on.
And you’ll always be a pearl.”